Spiritual Legacy

My Grandfather, Dore Dow Stephenson, known to most as Steve, chose Jesus!  Not because he was forced to.  Not because he was manipulated into it...but because he experienced the Love of a Savior, a Father who loved him no matter what...and he chose Him.  That was a turning point in the line of his future generations that will forever be blessed!  I can tell my children, and their children and their children and so on, that the decision that Grandpa Stephenson made, forever changed the course of our family. 

He was raised in Texas, (whoo hoo) and then moved to New Mexico.  He was working for the railroad when he  met my grandmother, they fell in love, got married and my grandmother got pregnant!  He left for World War II and my mom was born while he was overseas.
He was a pilot, flying from England over Germany bombing areas.  His plane was shot at, and he had a very risky landing, which earned him a medal.(if I give you the exact account, I am quite sure I would mess it up, so this is simplifying it!)   He would talk with anyone about his job in the military, about his flying experience, and his Love of our country.  He would talk to you for HOURS about that!  I loved it!  I loved hearing about his joy and his passion!

the "jerilyne sue" named after my mom, you can see it barely written on the side of the plane

He returned home after WWII, and began to work on the railroad, he then transferred to a company in Los Alamos, New Mexico, where he remained at his job until he retired.

During the early stages of his life, and in his marriage, he was not a Believer.

God was obviously protecting him, through 35 missions in WWII,, to prepare him to lead generations of people into a love of Christ.

My mother was in high school, attending church with her sister and mother, and my Grandpa would just stay home and read the newspaper. What they found out later, is that when they left for church, he would get his Bible out and begin to read.  One week a revival came to town (Johnny Bisagno was the revival pastor) and he asked for people to walk over and touch the hand of someone they were praying for that did not know Christ.  My mom went over to my Grandfather and touched his hand, but he was already walking into the aisle to accept Christ.  And that was the beginning of a long, beautiful journey of following Christ with his heart, soul and spirit!  He was a changed man!

I am sure that my mother and my aunt probably have different viewpoints than I do regarding the kindness and calmness of my grandfather (haha) but I only knew him as a kind, compassionate, loving, quiet, gentle man who loved Jesus.  I have had the privilege of owning one of his Bibles and he read it and marked it up and prayed for people through that Bible. 

The only incident I know of, regarding any anger, is when he was in a Deacon's meeting at his current church ( and they are all over 70 in that church) and one deacon basically called my grandfather a liar.  Well, that was it!  My grandfather was a quiet man, but when you attacked his character, he was ready to "take it outside" (my 6'3" grandfather and this very small man).  The man, who apparently was very smart, decided against going outside...but I am sure my grandfather would have put the "love of Christ" into that man that day!   I still laugh hearing him tell the story.

He created a legacy of loving Christ, loving people, knowing when to be quiet and when to speak up, honoring my grandmother with respect and dignity (even when she constantly talked his ear off!), and creating a safehaven for his family and for our generations to follow.  I know that my sister and my cousins would agree with me, that he was a loving, Godly man that we all loved and respected and thank God for him in our lives and in our families. 

When my grandmother passed away 3 years ago, my grandfather was there, holding her hand. He loved her and cherished her until the day she died.  And he has missed her ever since.

 

He touched many lives in the last three years before he died, especially the lives of the people in the retirement home in which he lived.  One lady who worked there,  even nominated him to be able to fly in the same type of bomber airplane that he flew in WWII. Last year, at the end of June, he was picked to go up one more time, at the age of 93, into the big blue sky, and hear the roar of the engine and feel the plane lift off of the ground and experience what he loved to do, one more time!

waiting to get onto the plane in his original WWII bomber jacket

Following that,  there are the couples who came every week to entertain at the home where he stayed.  One particular couple would come weekly and my Grandpa loved them, and they loved him.  He would get there early in order to have a good seat and be able to hear them.  He requested one of his favorite songs "coming in on a wing and a prayer" to be sung, and they knew it.  They would sing it every week for him when they came.  Yesterday, they were informed that he was not going to make it much longer, so they came to his room, and the man who sings it, knelt next to my grandfather, took his hat off in respect, and quietly sang this song to him one more time.  This is in honor of him:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5IcIjKtQrWc

 He has been without my grandmother now for 3 years, and he was ready to go home.  He was ready to go see the love of his life, go see the Savior that he faithfully served, and to be able to have a freedom to live in the fullness of Christ!  It is finished and he has been a "good and faithful servant"

I thank him for being a wonderful father to my mother,

I thank him for being a wonderful grandfather to me

I thank him for loving on my children and being a patient great grandfather

I thank him for being a loving, Godly husband to my grandmother

I thank him for being a devout believer in Christ, and for following Him unashamedly for the rest of his life

I thank him for the spiritual legacy he has left behind, one that will be blessed from generation to generation.

¹⁴ For this reason I kneel before the Father^{[a] 15} from whom every family in heaven and on earth is named. ¹⁶ I pray that He may grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with power in the inner man through His Spirit, ¹⁷ and that the Messiah may dwell in your hearts through faith. I pray that you, being rooted and firmly established in love, ¹⁸ may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the length and width, height and depth of God’s love, ¹⁹ and to know the Messiah’s love that surpasses knowledge, so you may be filled with all the fullness of God.
²⁰ Now to Him who is able to do above and beyond all that we ask or think according to the power that works in us— ²¹ to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen.  Ephesians 3:14-21

I love you Grandpa! 

Equality ???

This is a symbol for me that represents my entire life.  Not my Sunday morning life, not my Easter weekend life, but my entire life.  I have been watching this week on facebook, especially, and a little bit on Twitter, and I have seen a lot of hatred being spewed.  The issue of Equality has come up specifically this week due to "gay marriage".  It has been very interesting watching people's view and convictions, watching intolerance of others (on both sides of the board) and the hatred that has been spewing forward.    I have friends who live a lifestyle that is different from mine.  They know my view point, my opinions, my convictions, and I know theirs.  We disagree on things and we agree on things, but ultimately, they are my friends.  I have friends who share the same convictions as me, and yet we still disagree on things, and disagree how things should be addressed.  I am not typing this blog today to defend my beliefs, to attack others on their beliefs, or to get into arguments about my view points on "equality".  That is not my purpose. 

What my heart is feeling today is sadness.   It is Good Friday.  If you are Believer, it means that Jesus chose to go to the cross and be sacrificed for you.  He did this whether you believe in Him or not, whether you choose Him or not, and whether you ultimately follow Him or not.  He did this despite your choices or beliefs.  He did this completely out of love.  He did this because He created every single person with a purpose and a plan.  If you are not a believer, it makes no difference to you, this is simply another day.    This is where Good Friday and Equality cross paths for me today. 

I watch my friends who live the different lifestyle from me getting pounded and beaten up by Believers.  I watch them fight back for their opinions.  I watch the definition of "sin" getting tossed around by people on both sides.  I watch the phrases "love the sinner, hate the sin" and "all of the bigots" and multiple attacks get thrown around like a football on Friday night in Texas! 
Here is the deal, we ALL sin.  Whether you want to identify certain behaviors as sin or not, is not a discussion that I want to be in.  All I know is that we all sin.  It is humans that have defined what they believe are "worse" sins than others.  There are biblical references for sins in the bible.  Yes, there are references to homosexuality, as there are also references to adultry, pre-marital sex, lying, cheating, murder, slander, inciting those to confrontation, and the list goes on and on.  That is the exact purpose of the Cross.  The purpose of the cross was not to sit in judgement to identify which sin is worse, which person is worse because they commit this sin or behavior and how to condemn them.  That is the exact opposite of the cross.  The cross was to bridge the way into heaven where we are cleansed from any choice that we make which is against who God is,  and we have freedom from the traps of the enemy's snare.  We seem to forget that as Believers.  We make it our goal to attack those who believe differently from us, to shame them, to level them to the ground.  Really?  Is that really what you were called to do?   The cross is simply to bring Freedom!

I have been able to maintain relationships with people who live a homosexual lifestyle, with people who completely disregard God or His existence, or any belief in Him, those who have had abortions, those who have committed adultry, friends who lie, cheat and steal, girls who gossip and slander, and Believers who incite others to anger.  I am not saying this to make me look great and holy.  I am saying this because those people have also maintained relationships with me despite all of my failures, sins, choices, beliefs and decisions.  I will maintain my belief in Christ, I will share my belief in Christ, I pray for these friends on a consistent basis, and I know that Jesus died EQUALLY for them as He did me.  EQUALITY=  dying for all of us, despite our beliefs, choices, or opinions.   All Jesus wants is a relationship with us, where we are, who we are, and how we are.  It is not my job to change hearts.  I absolutely do not have that authority or power.   I love all of my friends.  I love who they are.  I may disagree on issues, "sins" and beliefs, but I love them with the love of Christ, that is so overwhelmingly powerful that it is indescribable!  I don't care about behaviors, I care about  hearts.  My heart will always be praying for my friends.  (whether they like it or not! :) )
Today as I remember the Cross and what Jesus chose to do, I will remember all of my friends..those who partake in the Celebration with me, those who do not.  Those who are fighting for things I may  disagree with, those who disagree with things that I fight for.  Those who are hurting and need healing, those who are joyful and peaceful. Those who are worn and tired, those who are refreshed and awake, those who fight against me and those who are with me.   We are all equal in the sight of God, and we all deserve what He did on the cross as we all, in our way, sent Him there.  Thank you for being my friend, thank you for letting me be your friend.  Thank you for listening to me when you do not agree with me, and thank you for letting me listen to you and speak when I do not agree.   This song is one of my favorite songs.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dLDGVl8D5UU  Please feel free to watch it.  This is the love I am talking about!    "I pray that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, would give you a spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of Him." Eph 1:7.    I LOVE YOU MY FRIENDS! 

Silence

PSALM 30

I will exalt You, Lord because you have lifted me up and have not allowed my enemies to triumph over me.
Lord, my God, I cried to You for help, and You healed me. Lord, You brought me up from Sheol, You spared me from among those going down to the Pit.
Sing to the Lord, you His faithful ones, and praise His holy name.
For His anger lasts only a moment, but His favor, a lifetime.
weeping may spend the night, but there is joy in the morning!
When I was secure, I said, "I will never be shaken".
Lord, when You showed Your favor, You made me stand like a strong mountain; when You hid your face, I was terrified.
Lord, I called to you, I sought favor from My Lord:  "What gain is there in my death, in my descending to the Pit?  Will the dust praise you?  Will it proclaim Your truth?  Lord, listen and be gracious to me; Lord, be my helper.

You turned my lament into dancing
You removed my sackcloth and clothed me with Gladness
SO THAT I CAN SING TO YOU AND NOT BE SILENT
Lord My God, I will praise you forever!

Silence......this is something that most of the time makes me uncomfortable.  As many of you know me, I like to talk....ha!  That is an understatement....let me re-emphasize that....I LIKE TO TALK !!  My husband loves silence.  Kind of a crazy, only God ordained relationship we have!  I understand the purpose of silence.  Be still and know that I am God.  I understand the place for silence.  I understand the importance of silence....but ....is it my love?

This psalm is one that I love.  I have read it a million times and honestly, most people who have read this focus on the "pain in the night, joy in the morning" verse.   While I love that verse dearly, tonight...as I was worshiping and listening to God, this verse exploded in my head.....SO THAT I CAN SING TO YOU AND NOT BE SILENT !    I love to worship!  I love to sing to my Father!  I love to "not be silent".  I love the freedom in expression, in language, in shouts of joy, in loud weeping of our souls.  I love to praise from the depths of my heart.

 David wrote this Psalm after committing a horrible sin and deaths of his followers were a result of God's punishment for David.  He writes this Psalm out of the truth that he knew of God.  God loves him despite his failures, that it is total fear to live outside of God's face, and that His anger lasts only for a season and joy always follows.  But that one thing that David was great at, was worshipping!  His greatest joy was that He could Sing to God and not be silent!

I do not want to be silent towards God. I want to express my love, my joy, my passion, my fears, my failures and my release to Him, my Lord, my Savior, my hope and my Father!   The truth is...how CAN I be silent?    In Revelation, the cherubim are surrounding Jesus constantly singing and praising.....constantly, without fail.  This is where I want to be!!

Where are you in your life today?  Are you silent in your expression to Jesus?  Does your heart fill with joy at just the thought of being able to praise Him?  I challenge you to spend time today NOT being silent!  Whether it is in your house, your car, your shower, or your sanctuary....do not be silent!  Express out loud your love for Him, for what He has done for you and what He will do for you!   Sing!  Even if you cannot!  Express to Him the reason that you follow Him!  Get out of your comfort zone and do not be Silent!  Enjoy the Freedom you have in Christ and relish in it!  Love this day of Worship!

Sadness, abuse and John Langworthy

I am sitting here after a long week last week in Clinton Mississippi where I watched three victims finally get the one thing that they have been longing to hear for over 20 years....."GUILTY" for molesting them when they were young boys.  No, John Langworthy did not receive any prison time as a result of his plea bargain (for many reasons) and yes, he does have to register as a sexual offender and receive a felony conviction.  Was this justice enough?  Some will say yes, some will say  no.  There have been much crazier sentences for these types of offenses going both ways...so it is all a matter of opinion.  I believe that ultimately there will be more to come for Mr.  Langworthy and so I rest in that at this time.

My sadness comes from many parts regarding this entire 30 years of molestation that this man has committed.  First and foremost, his victims.  Whether they have remained in silence and torture for the last 30 years with no where to turn, whether they have been outspoken and no one has listened, or whether they have received justice...they are all victims of this man, sexually, emotionally and spiritually.
My heart breaks for what they had to endure as children and for the people in authority who listened to what he did to them and then re-victimized them once again by failing to protect them legally.

My sadness is for the parents of these victims, who felt helpless, shame and did not know that they had a voice.  Authorities telling them, or even pressuring/threatening them to not report these crimes...and they were unaware of their rights and voice.   My sadness comes from all that they had to endure, and still endure to this day.

My sadness goes out to the current members of Prestonwood Baptist Church.  They have no idea what took place 20+ years ago, and are still not being told the truth.  I am saddened by an executive staff and the choices that they made at the time that John was on staff, and the choices that they are currently choosing to make by remaining silent in light of legal testimony showing otherwise.  They had a LEGAL responsibility to report these crimes, especially when the offender admits these crimes against children to them and they STILL do not report to the police.   I am sad for them that when even ONE victim comes forth in Mississippi after John's stay at Prestonwood, they will have to live with the fact that had they done the right thing...there would be no more victims.  They are culpable for any victims that come out of Mississippi after 1989.  I am sad that their choices most likely have resulted in a large amount of victims.  I am sad they are not being honest with their congregation.    I ultimately pray for healing for this church when this all comes to a head, and it will.   Members of this congregation (at least those not involved in the John Langworthy case in the late 80's) had no idea and will still suffer consequences based on this staff's choices.  I hope that through this, healing will begin in multiple levels at Prestonwood Baptist Church.

I pray for the congregation at Morrison Heights Baptist Church.  I am saddened still by how this was handled, but ultimately it proved to be God's mercy and timing.  I am sad that there is still a large community at this church who are more concerned about the welfare of Mr. Langworthy than his victims.  They have created an environment which is very volatile for victims to speak out.  They will be scared to death, especially since he is still out in the community and they see the outpouring of support for him.  This community has made it almost impossible for any of his victims to feel safe.  The school and the school administration of Clinton High School is also culpable for that too.  Sadness for the victims still in Clinton and Jackson  Mississippi who are not free to receive the help they need.  I hope and pray that Morrison Heights will step up and create a safe environment and focus now on the potential victims of John Langworthy and not slide this under the rug as Prestonwood has done for 25 years now.

I am sad that there are so many people whose lives have been affected by this ONE MAN....from many, many victims and their families, to church staff members and the integrity and character of a church, to political leaders in Mississippi whose careers could be affected because of him, to judges and attorneys, and to many other parties and entities that we do not even know about.  I am sad that his children have to endure what they will now endure and pray constantly for healing for them through this.  Mostly I am sad that a man, who presented himself a follower of Christ, has caused SO MUCH HARM to the church body and to non-believers.  He has yet again, allowed Satan to use his efforts to kill, steal, and destroy lives.  Lives of victims, lives of believers, lives of non believers who will now again look at a church with disdain, contempt and refusal to believe in Christ.  That is what overwhelmingly breaks my heart.  I am righteously angry at John Langworthy for all he has destroyed and for the hundreds of lives he has impacted.  There are some who say that he is the reason that they found Christ.  My first response to that is that God can use ANYONE to lead you to Christ, even a donkey.  John Langworthy did a fantastic job of leading double life...he was VERY good at it and manipulated and controlled a lot of people, and I suspect he still does.  But JESUS CHRIST is the complete opposite of John Langworthy.  He will never harm a child, He will never condemn you or spiritually manipulate you, and He will never shame you!   He is TRUTH,  He is LOVE, and He is COMPASSION and He will always be there for you, with no ulterior motive.   So, despite all of your harm, Mr. Langworthy,  JESUS WILL PREVAIL !  Despite Prestonwood's lack of character and legal responsibility, JESUS WILL PREVAIL, and despite Morrison Heights lack of a safe environment for victims, JESUS WILL PREVAIL!

"Doing His Thing"

Today I am full of joy!  I am not sure why?  I am homeschooling, dealing with a 2 year old who has decided to do the exact opposite of any instruction or anything I say, and a puppy who is very very full of energy!  I feel like I am fighting twenty different battles a day....and yet I feel joyful??   There is a very big difference between happy and joyful.  There are many, many times during the day that I am not happy.  I am frustrated, I am mad (usually directed at a  puppy!) and I am exhausted....but yet there is joy!  Joy comes from a much deeper place than our emotions and our feelings.  Joy comes from a constant knowledge that God is in control, He does not give us more than we can  handle, and He ALWAYS provides a way out.  Where do you see the joy in your day?  Are you sometimes overwhelmed by "stuff" that is in your life?  If you do not see joy, WHY?  Explore that today.  Where is my joy? Where is it coming from?  

Joy is a fruit of the Spirit.  It means the Holy Spirit is able to work through you, to you, and with you to provide exactly what you need, when you need it.  He also uses the fruits of the Spirit to work in others lives.  I have seen many people going through horrendous circumstances, and yet people walk away from THEM experiencing love and understanding and Christ.  How?  Because they have JOY that is flowing out of them, despite their circumstances, despite their feelings, despite their "lot".....they have chosen to let the Holy Spirit "do His thing!", (as one girl put it).  She said she was just a container and the Holy Spirit used her to "do His thing".   (She also was 13).   Sometimes in our life and age, we forget that.  We put so many boundaries around it and laws around it and legalism around it...that we forget to just let the Holy Spirit "do His thing" and enjoy being chosen to participate!  

Look for examples today of Joy. Joy in others, and joy in yourself!  Give us examples so we can all enjoy seeing the Holy Spirit "do His thing": !!

Parting ways

As my dear sweet friend is leaving to minister abroad....I am left with several different things:
The first, thank God for things like Facebook, FaceTime and Magic Jack, because I can still be a part of her life on a daily basis!  Even though it is never the same as  TRUE face time, it is as close as we can get at this moment!

Second, I am thankful that God is calling them on this journey and they are faithful to the calling.  How many of us have a calling that has been on our life and for whatever reason we have justified NOT doing it.  Our reasons may be money, time, fear, lack of resources, etc....but overall, we are failing in what God has prepared and maybe even chosen us to do, before we were even born.   I want to be at the end of my life, whenever that may be....and know that above all, I was faithful to hear my Father and to obey, no matter what the circumstances or choices I made.  I want to hear "Good and faithful Servant" and know that I fulfilled my calling.  I want to be happy in that calling!   That does not mean we have to be miserable!  I am confident  I DO know what my calling is and have seen harvest and reaping from it in so many ways!  Do you?  Where are you in your life?  Are you at the beginning of it?  Just finding out all of your opportunities?  Are you at middle, regretting some past decisions and looking for opportunities to change?  Are you nearing the end and cherishing memories, tasks, relationships and joy!  I hope that you are all in these different stages loving on each other and loving God and following His call for your life!

Third, I am thankful that despite our geological barrier, we have a Heavenly Father connection that is faster than the speed of light!  I can connect, pray and minister to her and her family a gazillion miles away, and know that God is there, instantly, to comfort and provide peace!  No one else has that!  No one!   Only through our heavenly Father can you have that!  How awesome is that!!

"Parting ways is such sweet sorrow"...I never understood that until this journey with my friend.  I am so happy for her journey, and so selfishly sad along the way.  Sad for me that is. It gives me new perspective on the friendships I currently have,  on my prioritizing of those friendships, and how I need to be purposeful in my time with them.  We never know how much time we have....at 16, at 28, at 45, or at 60.......and we need to make EVERY single moment count.

I love my friend and I am happy that I am walking through this journey and God is working on my heart!
Where is He working on your heart?

My friend  Amy Travis (red shirt)

New Year....mingling seasons!

2013~~  What will this look like for you?  For me, we have pre-menopause, puberty, potty training and puppy...the year of the P's!  It makes me laugh that in my little life, I have such a variety of things happening.  We think that we go from season to season, and those seasons are fairly consistent.  Nope!  Just when you think you have completed one season and are entering into another...God laughs and says, Oh but wait...my seasons mingle!   I will keep a little tiny bit of the old, add some new, and then, just for fun....throw in a curve ball.....just to keep you on your toes!  It's like having summer...and in  Texas, we know that can be hot, exhausting and long...but occassionally God will throw in a hint of fall, even for a day...that helps you know that there is hope, there is a change coming, and we can make it through what we are currently enduring.  What season are you in?  What glimpse of change has  God thrown in to your life to give you hope, faith, excitement or endurance?  
As we enter into 2013, God has shown us a glimpse of this season.  For me it will be prioritizing.  This will include time, events, relationships, and commitments.  With the 4 P's in place at my house, focus has to change, some relationships will stay the same, some will change.  Focus on my family and children are changing as they are entering into a new season of their own lives...and quality time with my husband will look differently.  I am very excited about this season....my children are entering into my favorite time....teenage-ish years.  Been waiting for this time!  I know that sounds crazy, but I love these years!  They are very fun and enjoyable for me, even with the clashing of voices, hormones raging and opinions being expressed.
I pray for guidance this year...I pray for wisdom and knowledge as I travel this journey with my family.  I pray for clear ears to hear the Father and only do what He directs me to do.  Pray with me as we travel this journey together this year.  Let's lift each other up, help each other balance our "seasons" out, and encourage each other as they walk through these seasons.  Share with me what is on your heart!  I want this blog to be interactive, and encouraging!
Love you guys!   "with everything...turn, turn, turn."